a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
