ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
