drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize
