Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
vagina is talking i cant
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
