Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
