The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Randomize
