You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.