So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
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do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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