Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
