OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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