hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize