Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Randomize