I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Randomize
