I need help removing her.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me