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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  I need help removing her.

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test

  (1-313): View more from Michigan

  but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.

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• (604): View more from British Columbia

  the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.

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• (917): View more from New York City

  They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (641): View more from Iowa

  I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.

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• (469): View more from Texas

  On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?

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• (353): View more from

  I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!

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• (208): View more from Idaho

  I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (954): View more from Florida

  After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me

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