I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
