I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize
