im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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