Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
birth control should be required to get into college
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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