WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize