why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
