Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
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