kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
