All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
God, I missed his penis.
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