I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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