Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize