Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
