Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
