I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Randomize
