we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
