used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize