Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
How's work?
Spinning.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize