question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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