ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Randomize
