Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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