I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
