I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize