Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
