I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Randomize