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• (406): View more from Montana

  also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)

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• (951): View more from California

  Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?

  (949): View more from California

  Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.

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• (708): View more from Illinois

  we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (919): View more from North Carolina

  Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.

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• (830): View more from Texas

  Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN

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• (618): View more from Illinois

  If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.

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• (530): View more from California

  75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.

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