You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
