he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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