guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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