I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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