dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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