Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
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