I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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