I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
