Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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