I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I wannas sexs uuuuu
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
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What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Mom said you looked used
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
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