Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I am never drinking with the goths again.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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