I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.