i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
